Tag: marriage

God’s Grace-Filled Mirror for Men This Valentine’s Day

Marriage isn’t just a romantic partnership—it’s a full-length mirror that God uses to reveal our true selves.

As a Christian men’s coach deeply invested in helping men thrive in their faith, purpose, and their marriages, Valentine’s Day always prompts me to reflect on the profound gift of a wife. Amid the chocolates and roses, let’s pause and consider a truth from Robert Wolgemuth’s Lies Men Believe: Marriage isn’t just a romantic partnership—it’s a full-length mirror that God uses to reveal our true selves.

Think about it, men. When we stand in front of that mirror, what do we see? Not the polished image we project at work or church, but the raw reality—our selfishness, impatience, or pride that surfaces in the daily grind of loving one woman faithfully. Wolgemuth nails it: Without a redeeming Savior, we’re hopelessly flawed, and marriage exposes that risk of mediocrity or outright failure. But here’s the beautiful flip side—this isn’t a curse; it’s God’s grace in action.

God didn’t design marriage primarily to make us happy, but to make us holy. That mirror forces us to confront our inability: “You and I cannot. God can.” When we acknowledge our weakness, maybe that short temper during disagreements or the tendency to prioritize hobbies over connection, we invite His power to transform us. It’s grace that empowers us to lead with humility, serve selflessly, and love like Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25). In this sanctifying process, our wives become instruments of God’s refinement, helping us grow into the men He calls us to be.

This Valentine’s Day, don’t just celebrate the romance; thank God for the mirror. Lean into it. Talk openly with your wife about what marriage is revealing in you. Seek His grace to counter lies like “My wife should make me happy” or “I can lead on my own strength.” Instead, embrace the truth: Marriage is a divine tool for holiness, drawing you closer to Him and her.

If you’re struggling, remember: Rebounding starts with reflection. Let’s honor our wives by pursuing Christlikeness together. Happy Valentine’s Day—may your marriage reflect His glory more brightly.

Pursue Your Wife

A godly husband doesn’t wait for romance to happen. He initiates it.

A godly husband doesn’t wait for romance to happen. He initiates it. God commands husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25). That sacrificial, pursuing love isn’t passive. Jesus pursued you when you were far off—He initiated, He pursued, He gave everything.

Your wife needs that same initiating love from you.

In the Song of Solomon, the husband doesn’t sit back; he pursues with passion: “Behold, you are beautiful, my love… You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride, with one glance of your eyes” (Song of Solomon 4:1,9).

He notices her, affirms her, draws her in. He leads the romance.

Colossians 3:19 echoes it: “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” Love actively, tenderly, without bitterness.

With everything going on in your life, it’s easy to coast in this area. But coasting cools intimacy. Your wife may not say it out loud, but she still longs to feel pursued, desired, cherished—like she’s your bride, not just your roommate.

So initiate today:

☑Plan a date night

📱Text her something specific you love about her—not generic, but personal.

🫶Hold her hand, look her in the eyes, tell her she’s captivating.

Pursue emotional connection first—listen without fixing—then let physical intimacy flow from that heart-bond.

This is biblical masculinity in action. Lead with love. Initiate with strength and tenderness. Watch God rekindle the fire in your marriage.

Your wife is worth the pursuit. She’s your gift from God.

Husbands: Who’s stepping up this week to pursue your wife like Jesus pursues us?

Drop a comment if you’re committing to initiate romance this week. Or DM me if you need practical ideas from the Rebound 8-Week Transformation Program for Men.

Your marriage matters eternally. Lead it well.