Turning fifty-five has caused me to become a bit more introspective. I won’t exhaust you with a list of 55 things I’ve learned in 55 years. I will offer 5 game-changing lessons I’ve made as a man, husband, father, pastor, and coach. Ignoring these will bring unnecessary pain.
#1 Make Decisions Based on Your Values. Solid values did not always drive my own decisions when I was younger. Pleasing others, climbing the ladder, and making a reputation distracted me. When I did reach what I thought was the pinnacle of my career I felt emptier than ever. Avoid unnecessary pain by discerning your values now and allowing every decision to flow easily from those values. You won’t be disappointed.
#2 Surround Yourself with These 4 People. Every man needs a supporter. This is someone who believes in you without question. Every man also needs a challenger. This is someone who challenges you to achieve more. Additionally, a questioner is necessary. They will keep you honest. Finally, a mentor or coach is important. This is someone you can turn to for advice and guidance.
#3 You Will Fail. Fail Forward. In Russel Crowe’s Robinhood, there is a terrific statement about falling and failing. “Rise and rise again until lambs become lions.” I’ve held onto that statement. Everyone fails. Some fail and fall harder than others. Never stay down. Continue rising, learning, and falling again. Your character and tenacity will strengthen. Your naivety will shrink, and you will emerge the lion.
#4 Make a Difference for One Other Person. Life is hard. Many people find themselves lonely, broken, and hopeless. The greatest thing you can do is to pay attention to the people around you. Find at least one person you can help. It’s good for you – serving defeats selfishness and is good for them.
#5 It’s Never Too Late. You missed opportunities when you were younger. Now you know better. Make changes. Forgive. Heal. Rebound. You are never done until you’re dead. Get your mission straight and start living.
I’d like to know if any of these make sense to you. Do they confirm your experience? Let me know. If I can help you walk through any of these, reach out.
Dr. Ron Geisler 